Reaching For Normal Page 15

  The view from the ridge hadn’t changed. He felt Gage stiffen in fury. No one respected nature quite like Gage. He ran LaChance Lodge, where locals got their fishing gear and tourists rented their boats and cabins. Gage was more at home in the bush than anyone Sawyer knew.

  Once they were sure no one was lurking or had set a trap for them, the men pulled the sleds to the side of the clearing and dismounted.

  Fresh snow had covered the tracks he and Myla had made but it took only a few seconds for Gage to interpret the scene. “The bastard sliced him up there. Let’s find something to nail him.”

  They spent an hour examining the scene and taking notes and pictures. Sawyer recounted everything he and Myla had seen and things he suspected but hadn’t shared. “Someone wanted this to be seen.”

  Dave nodded. “Which means there’s a good possibility we’re being watched right now.”

  Without looking up, Gage pointed to the west. “My guess is two hills over in that direction. High ground. Lots of cover. The coward’s probably got binoculars. Watching us is giving him his jollies.” Gage flashed his middle finger in that direction.

  Quinn laughed. “You think he’ll see you from that distance?”

  “If he’s got the right equipment. But he’s not as smart as he thinks he is. He’s definitely not smart enough. We’ll get him.”

  Dave motioned at the wolf. “I’ve got enough pictures for evidence. You want to cut this poor beast down?”

  Sawyer sure did. Seeing an animal butchered with such cruelty was tough and he knew he’d be seeing the image in his nightmares.

  As they worked, Gage studied the pelt. “Looks like he shot him first, then used a knife nowhere near big enough for the job.”

  Dave’s lip curled in disgust. “Baited a trap for him too. The question is why?”

  No easy answers for that one.

  After finding nothing further, they headed to where Sawyer’s sleds had been burnt to a crisp.

  “Starting to look like you pissed somebody off, Banks.”

  The scene looked worse close up. Charred metal and blackened cargo were covered by a layer of snow but the wind had left much of the damage exposed.

  “This has to be connected to the wolf. No way we’ve got two separate crazy bastards running around Bloo Moose.” Dave’s comment had everyone nodding.

  “Did he blow up Sawyer’s sled because he’s the one he’s trying to get to or because he was the one out here?”

  Sawyer shrugged.

  Dave continued. “Your trails are out here. No hunting cabins or cottages in the neighborhood. You’re involved with the wolf reintegration program.”

  Sawyer’s head jerked up. “Wait. How do you know? I’m not an official participant.”

  The other men laughed and Quinn answered. “You’ve been away with the teams too long. You think there’s such a thing as privacy. This is Bloo Moose, no secrets allowed.”

  True. Scary but true.

  Was this really about him? Seemed too far out there to be believable. He didn’t interact with many people enough to piss them off this much. Not since Jen. And even that had connected back to Afghanistan. Could this? No matter how he looked at it, Sawyer couldn’t see any connections.

  Gage wandered the site looking for whatever he looked for while Dave took pictures for evidence. There wasn’t anything to salvage so Sawyer turned his attention on figuring out the puzzle.

  The sound of a sled approaching had them all pulling out weapons and spreading out to make themselves difficult targets. Sawyer moved to the edge of some pines and turned to watch in the other direction. The way things had gone, the sled was a distraction and someone was creeping up on their six.

  When the sled revved down and the crackle of a radio filled the silence, his shoulders relaxed but he kept his gun up and his senses alert. Dave pulled out his radio and confirmed that it was Anders on his way in.

  Which meant Myla was in town.

  When the deputy pulled into the clearing, Sawyer blew out a deep breath and pulled in another. She was safe.

  “You get Sawyer’s lady back to town, Scott?” shouted Quinn.

  “She’s not my lady.” Except his voice sounded like a growl.

  Quinn laughed. “You keep telling yourself that. Wait. That means she’s fair game. Good to know.”

  Even though he knew Quinn was goading him, Sawyer couldn’t keep his lips shut. “Don’t even think about it.”

  Quinn laughed again but slapped Sawyer on the back. “Wouldn’t think about it. Besides, it’s not me her eyes are on.”

  Gage stopped Sawyer from any more stupid comments when he spoke up. “Time to get this jerk. Let’s find his hidey-hole.”

  Good.

  After they loaded up the sleds, Gage took the lead and angled north. They drove for a while before turning west to circle around to the back of the hill. When Gage pulled up beneath a canopy of trees, the others pulled in behind. At a hand signal from Gage, they all turned off the machines at once, making it harder to identify the number of sleds if anyone was listening.

  Gage’s voice was soft. “Our target hill is about a half-mile ahead. Someone should stay with the sleds. I’d vote for the idiot who lost his own but I’m pretty sure he’s going to refuse.”

  Damn straight. In the end, they left the deputy with the machines. Scott didn’t complain much but he slugged Sawyer on the shoulder as they were heading out. “Take him down for me, boys. He needs to pay for scaring that little sweetheart.”

  The four men moved out, eyes and ears wide open for any sign of human interaction within the forest. An indentation at the bottom of a rise snagged Sawyer’s attention and he motioned to the others. The spot didn’t match the flow of the terrain and that often meant human.

  The indentation wasn’t big enough for a tent. It was a dumb place for a food cache but the only thing he turned up was a candy wrapper. Not an energy bar or a granola bar. Candy.

  The sugar crash could be deadly in the winter. Whoever this guy was, he wasn’t an experienced outdoorsman. At least they had that in their favor.

  Sawyer held up the wrapper as he turned back to the others. All three either raised an eyebrow or shook their heads but no one broke the silence with a comment.

  As they neared the top of the next rise, the smell of smoke drifted toward them. The men stuffed their gloves into their pockets and unholstered their guns.

  Sawyer and Gage took the high ground, waited while Quinn and Dave spread out to the sides. Gage’s fierce grin had Sawyer’s own adrenaline kicking in. Time to find out who was behind all the bizarre incidents.

  Down on their bellies, they eased to the summit and crossed the short plateau. A quick survey showed tracks and Sawyer nearly cheered. They had him. Even if he wasn’t there, they’d have him soon. He wasn’t getting away.

  The sled tracks converged on a tight copse of spruce and pine. As they eased down the hill, they spotted Quinn and Dave emerging on either side.

  When they were positioned around the copse, Dave called out. “Police. You’re surrounded. Throw down your weapons and come out with your hands up.”

  An instant of silence was followed by a quiet curse and the sounds of movement. Sawyer wanted to rush the trees but he forced himself to wait for Dave’s signal. As the police chief, he was the leader.

  The sound of a rifle being ratcheted shattered the silence and the scene in front of Sawyer hazed and faded out.

  Afghanistan.

  Heat poured over him, through him. Bugs swarmed his skin and crawled under his clothing. Blisters from his new combat boots burned as the sweat seeped into them. He smelled the smoke and knew it was from the village though he was miles away. Rushing through the undergrowth, he swung his gun back and forth, waiting for a strike that never came.

  Too late.

  He was too damn late.

  The acrid smell of smoldering flesh overwhelmed the smoke and he sped up, rushed between the remains of two huts.

  No en
emies in sight.

  Only bodies.

  A few clinging to life, yet all he could do was hold their hands as they breathed their last.

  Forcing the scenes of death from his mind, Sawyer took in deep breaths and closed his eyes. When he opened them, he saw reality. Snow. Trees.

  He hadn’t had a damned flashback in months.

  With shaking hands, he lowered his gun until he was back in control. Pulling himself to the present took only seconds but felt like hours.

  Christ, he was a broken mess.

  Sawyer looked around to find he was alone. He’d missed the signal to move. To help. He’d left his buddies vulnerable.

  Moving swiftly, he focused on the feel of the snowshoes pressing down the snow, the scent of the pines and spruce, the slap of the branches as he moved through them.

  The mutter of voices reached him, reassuring him his friends were in charge. When he entered the open space inside the ring of trees, he found them whole and unharmed, surrounding a man face down on the ground. Dave was cuffing his hands behind his back.

  All eyes cut his way, except for the man on the ground. Sawyer gave a nod, not quite sure what he was saying, and moved around to face the man who’d killed a wolf and blown up his sleds.

  Sharp bones, straight nose, long chin. A face he’d never seen before. Maybe it wasn’t about Sawyer at all and the coincidences were exactly that.

  Dave lifted the guy into a sitting position and he made eye contact with Sawyer. The change was instantaneous.

  The man spewed curses and spit into the snow at Sawyer’s feet. He fought the restraints but Dave easily kept him in place.

  “Who the hell are you?”

  A sneer instead of an answer. Another gob of spit.

  “Do you know me?”

  The man struggled against his restraints. “Let me go. You’ve got no right to grab me. I ain’t done nothing.”

  “What are you doing out here?” Dave drew the man’s attention from Sawyer but his eyes returned continually while the chief questioned him.

  “Why’d you kill that wolf?”

  “I told you. I don’t know nothing about no strung-up wolf.”

  The men exchanged glances. Dave had said the wolf was dead, not strung up. Enough for Dave to take him in but not enough to answer any of their questions.

  Dave radioed Scott and the deputy drove in one of the sleds, then took Gage and Quinn back to get the rest. All the while, Sawyer and Dave battered the man with questions but they didn’t get any useful answers, although he did make another mistake when he revealed he knew the color of Sawyer’s burned-to-a-crisp sled.

  The so-called campsite didn’t reveal much either. No ID. New gear, including the sled but nothing purchased locally. Beer and candy amongst the food and drink. Definitely an amateur with no idea what he was doing camping in the winter.

  So, why was he doing it?

  If the target was Sawyer and he wanted to kill him, he’d had dozens of opportunities. Hell, he could have done it at Sawyer’s cabin without even heading to the bush. Few people came out to his place without being invited and he rarely did any inviting.

  A single shot as Sawyer left the house would have left him lying in the snow for days before anyone found the body.

  Sawyer holstered his gun and rubbed his hands over his face. Even after capturing the guy, none of it made sense. From his training, he knew even the craziest of the crazies followed an internal logic. He couldn’t see a lick of it here which meant they were missing something important.

  Without any answers, they loaded the guy into the trailer attached to Dave’s sled and evened out the rest of the gear. Dave led the way so the others could keep the guy in their sights.

  Once again on the back of Gage’s sled, Sawyer tried to put clues together. To no avail.

  They’d gone a few miles when his headset crackled. “You okay now?”

  Shit. He’d known they would have noticed his screw up but he’d hoped they’d ignore it. “I’m good.”

  Gage nodded and managed to stay quiet for a minute or two but as the eldest of four siblings, he was too used to meddling to let it go. “Afghanistan?”

  Sawyer swore and Gage nodded again. “Happen a lot?” Not even an ounce of judgment in his tone.

  “Hell no. Don’t know what brought it on today.”

  Gage snorted out a laugh. “Then you’re not as smart as I thought. You’ve been trying to catch an unhinged man and keep a woman you care about safe in damn tough circumstances. Trying to make sure no one dies on your watch.”

  Sawyer started to protest but Gage kept talking. “And trying to ignore the fact that the chemistry between the two of you is electric enough to set our hair on fire. Never mind the fact that neither of you appears to want to admit it. Even though it’s obvious as hell to the rest of us. With all those emotions overloading your system, I’d say it’s nothing but normal to flashback to another crazy time.”

  Normal. There was a word that didn’t crop up often in regards to his mental state.

  Gage laughed softly. “You’ve got a handful of something pretty amazing there and it’s going to be fun watching the two of you figure it out.”

  Well. Hell.

  Was Gage right?

  He’d only known Myla a couple of days. And she’d lied to him. Kept the truth hidden from him.

  Wanted to have sex with him.

  Even though she was a virgin.

  “Go ahead, tell me you haven’t been worrying about her the whole time we’ve been out here.”

  Sawyer didn’t dignify that with a response, making Gage laugh again. “Going to be fun, I tell you.”

  Fun wasn’t the word Sawyer was thinking but it was going to be something.

  #finallymaybe

  Myla paced her room at the B&B until her aching knee forced her to sit. Maybe getting her thoughts down on the computer would stop them swirling in her head. Unfortunately, few of her thoughts were suitable for her articles. They were all about Sawyer.

  She was worried about his safety. And that of the other men as well. With two police officers and a former SEAL in the group, they should be safe but she didn’t know. Couldn’t know. She hadn’t even thought to ask the deputy to have someone tell her the outcome of the entire operation. Her only thoughts had been of Sawyer and the relief evident in his face as she left.

  He’d held her through the night, touched her until her world exploded in a symphony. Then he’d rebuffed her. Actually, he’d rebuffed her repeatedly. Even when she’d asked if he would be interested in sex.

  She was hopeful he was going to say yes until she’d played the virgin card. Keeping that to herself would have been the smart move but she didn’t want to lie to Sawyer, especially when he was convinced she was lying about her job. He must have been involved with some sleazy reporter for him to be so sure and so angry.

  She wanted him to trust her. Wanted him to believe in her. And hop into bed with her.

  Myla shook her head to try to spin the thoughts out of it. In the last few days, she’d become the master of cyclical thinking and she was making herself dizzy.

  Her window at the B&B looked out onto a side street but she angled her chair so she could see as much of the lake and the boardwalk as possible while still keeping an eye on the road. Maybe she’d see a sign they were safe.

  As the hours passed, Myla managed to get caught up in her articles enough to write some decent copy as well as several blog posts. She avoided the biggie—Clumsy Girl Takes a Plunge—and not into water. Especially when the guy sent such conflicting messages. Kissed better than any fantasy she'd had and so much better than the reality she'd experienced.

  His eyes burned into her, right deep down into her, unless they went blank. That part of him called to her too. She knew what it was like to have secrets, parts of you that ate you slowly from the inside out. She understood closing off a part of yourself from any and all eyes. But she wanted to reach out, help him find a way to heal his sha
ttered heart.

  Was she willing to take a chance on him seeing hers? Because it wasn't trust—or love—unless she was willing to take that risk. The thought had her up and pacing again.

  Love? She didn’t know about that.

  People only fell in love this quickly in books and movies. In the real world, lust sure but not love.

  Not that she knew a lot about it. Her nurses had cared for her and she kept in touch with two of them. Some of the foster parents had been very kind. But love? Nope. She had nothing to go on. It was impossible to know what it felt like.

  She'd probably mistaken everything in his eyes, in his kisses, in his actions, for love. In reality, it was probably lust. Which would fizzle away once he saw her.

  Clumsy Girl Takes The Coward's Way Out.

  No. Not this time.

  If the opportunity came, she'd risk it. Risk going deeper. Take a chance on him. And on herself.

  Try to build something with him. She’d find out if the man was interested in anything other than a quick roll in the sheets. Although, she'd take that too. As many times as he wanted to roll.

  The thought of Sawyer's hands on her skin had her flushing. All over. And checking the window.

  Silly. The deputy who'd met her at the lake's edge had told her to call the station in the morning to make arrangements to get her car from Sawyer's shed. Darby had given Myla her spare keys for her own car if she needed to drive anywhere in the meantime.

  Myla paced a bit but always returned to her chair by the window and her laptop. Writing had helped her through the toughest times in her life. When she hadn't had a laptop or even a notebook, she'd written in her head. Articles, exposes, stories, poems. Whatever suited her mood.

  At the moment, her mood was definitely running into the fiction area. Romance. Steamy romance.

  Why not?

  Normally, she outlined her ideas, did some brainstorming, had an idea where she was going with her writing. Tonight, she didn't need any of that. The emotions were bubbling.

  The story wasn't autobiographical. It didn't happen in the winter or in the woods but the hero was all Sawyer. She changed the name of course but the quicksilver moods, the eyes that burned fire then ice, the protective streak, the devastated heart, they were all him.